Mommy, Where Do Mini Coopers Come From?

Apparently they come from having unprotected sex with cars. The Telegraph reported a while back about a Washington State man, Edward Smith, who admitted to having sex with over a thousand cars.

Mr Smith, 57, first had sex with a car at the age of 15, and claims he has never been attracted to women or men. Smith said: “Maybe I’m a little bit off the wall but when I see movies like Herbie and Knight Rider, where cars become loveable, huggable characters it’s just wonderful. I’m a romantic. I write poetry about cars, I sing to them and talk to them just like a girlfriend. I know what’s in my heart and I have no desire to change.” He added: “I’m not sick and I don’t want to hurt anyone, cars are just my preference.”

His current “girlfriend” is a white Volkswagen Beetle named Vanilla, although he also, um, regularly “dates” a 1973 Opal GT named Cinnamon, and a 1993 Ford Ranger Splash, named Ginger. Before Vanilla, he had a five-year “relationship” with Victoria, a 1969 VW Beetle he bought from a family of Jehovah’s Witnesses.

But he confesses that many of the cars he has had sex with have belonged to strangers or car showrooms. “There are moments way out in the middle of nowhere when I see a little car parked and I swear it needs loving. There have been certain cars that attracted me and I would wait until night time, creep up to them and just hug and kiss them.” (Note to self: be sure to keep the TT in the garage at all times.)

When not content with just having “vanilla sex” Crazy Eddie moves on to other vehicles and machinery and says that his most intense sexual experience was “making love” to the helicopter from 1980s TV hit Airwolf.

And he’s not alone. This is an actual fetish called “mechaphilia”which is a sexual attraction to machines such as bicycles, motor vehicles, helicopters and airplanes. There’s even a film about it all (no, not Planes, Trains and Automobiles) called My Car is my Lover.

Mr Smith is now part of a global community of more than 500 “car lovers” brought together by Internet forums. So be careful the next time you Google “car lovers” — you might be in for a surprise.

Here’s the full article from the Telegraph: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/2000899/Man-admits-having-sex-with-1000-cars.html

About Thomas Kelleher

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This entry was posted in Love & Romance, Odds & Sods, Sex and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Mommy, Where Do Mini Coopers Come From?

  1. Sarah says:

    You know Thomas, I posted about this topic today on my weblog. Your article has really given me lots of food for thought and I feel you have made many important points. I really wish I had seen it earlier, before I published my own article! – cars2scrap

    Like

  2. Jessica says:

    I wonder how many people have actually done it in a car. As a guess I would say most, but then again most people won’t admit it.

    Like

  3. Hi Jessica. I agree, it’s pretty common to have sex in a car at some point in your life, which is quite different than having sex WITH a car. I suspect and hope that number is significantly lower!

    Like

  4. Pingback: Bullitt! « Thomas Kelleher's Blog

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